Friday, February 19, 2010

Back... but not really...

So back to this blog business... i regret not keeping it up during the study abroad but it went by so fast that i could barely jot my thoughts down before i realized i was already back. It seems so long ago that i was sitting in my room in Denmark, isolated from the world that i am apart of once again. I enjoyed the thought that i could wake up and drink some coffee, plain, black coffee, and read or possibly cook myself some breakfast. Everything moves so much faster here in the US. I guess i was apart of that life style until i got shoved into Europe. I miss it in someways... Hell, that's a lie, i miss it in A LOT of ways. The quietness of life when you're a person who doesn't understand a lick of Danish, or German, or Italian... It was great to feel alive, to be somewhere where you know if you don't do something now, that you'll never get to do it ever again. Haha, it's funny that i'm thinking about it now, i've been saving it to tell it to someone for a long time, but it's just not an experience you can really share with someone unless they've done the same. I had dinner with Donna the other day, we practically shared most of our study abroad experience together, through thick and thin i guess. It was a shocker just chillin with her, talking about how life has been after we got back. We both kinda agreed we were in some type of "funk". Nothing that would stop us from being ourselves, its just something that we felt that was missing. I try to think to myself "I cant think this like, i cant go back and do it again, its an experience that you've had and you can't dwell on it, go on and live". So far, it's been alright i'd say about 90% of the time. Work, School, Social gatherings have helped eased me back into the swing of things.

I've made some new friends, or i guess a new friend, not to say i've replaced my old ones, its just, everyone else seems so busy, and these new people just seem to have the same schedule as me. I keep thinking where the hell are my best friends at, all up in northern california, doing school of course, but i've been back for like 2 months now! eh, and again that's another reason why i've been hanging out with these new friends.

I'm thinking i wanna go somewhere, nothing particularly far i guess, just somewhere, somewhere new, maybe somewhere within a 2-3 hour drive. I wanna just get away... Theres nothing wrong with monotony, cuz hey, i wanna be a accountant. But theres always gotta be that something to spice your life up just a little and since my love life is alive as michael jackson, why not just find another reason. I've had this stupid beatles song stuck in my head for the past 4-5 hours... If I Fell.... WHYYYYY MUST YOU HAUNT ME SO SONGGGGG.... I really should be getting to bed, got work at 5am... of course when you stay up til 230 am the day before i doubt my body's gonna just naturally go to sleep. Maybe i should just stay up, of course, i normally like staying up if theres someone to stay up with, i doubt thats gonna happen. "Oh hey, wanna stay up with me til 5am? I know, i know its 1040pm right now and you're prolly gonna go to sleep soon but i figure why not give it a shot?" yeah.. thats not gonna fly. I was telling a friend how i normally write these kind of blogs on a really really good day, or a really really bad day, well... today was definitely not a really really good day haha... I feel stuck, gonna need some help here.